My Life Sucks but I Don’t Give a F*** March 23, 2009

Feeling down in the dumps? Do you want to mentally escape your daily woes? A popular social networking website named “FMyLife” just might do the trick. FMyLife has generated a lot of buzz among social circles as the go to website where users can read, reply to and write stories about their unlucky, embarassing and hilarious experiences. The bleaker and darker the story, the better it is.

The website originated in France in 2008 by developers Maxime Valette and Guillaume Passaglia as the website “VieDeMerde.fr”. The website has since launched an English speaking website early in January under the control of Didier Guedj. It currently receives 1 million hits per day, mostly coming from New York and Los Angeles. The website describes itself as:

A recollection of everyday anecdotes likely to happen to anyone. They are published on the site and written exclusively by our users. This site is a place to “let it all out” and unwind by sharing those little things that screw with your day; it allows you to realize that you are not alone. Posts are meant to start by ‘Today’ and end by ‘FML’. The site aims to be fun to read everyday.

For my friends and I, FMyLife is a perfect website to go to when you’re having a bad day and need to mentally escape your feelings of sadness, anger or if you’re sinply stressed out. The website is living proof of philosopher Voltaire’s quote “the misfortunes of some make for the happiness of others“. There’s no better way to feel better about a small misfortune like trailing toilet paper from your foot after going to the washroom than realizing someone else half-way across the world went to a bank machine to withdrawl $200 later to find out that they forgot to take the dispensed money. 

To be perfectly honest, FMyLife is ridiculously addictive once you start reading the first few postings. This is one of the main reasons why the website has gained so much popularity. One might conclude that the website is God-sent, but where is the line drawn between innocent play and dangerous territory?

Authors of the article “French Cash in on Internet Despair as Depression Builds Across Atlantic”, Charles Bremner and Marie Tourres, worry about the negative effects of FMyLife on its users and readers. Simply put, FMyLife is a place where people gather to wallow in self-pity and in most cases receive sypmathy from other users. People describe FMyLife as a social networking website- but for losers. Author of “Social Bad Luck” and sociologist Pierre Mannoni describes the dangers of websites about self-pity and misfortune as “Even if it’s done with humour, it can be dangerous to describe oneself endlessly as a loser. It can prevent you from succeeding.”

It is because of these reasons, that users need to tread carefully when dealing with these websites. Sure, it’s a fun read and can boost your mood, but the amount in which you indulge in sharing your experience with others can cause problems. Think carefully of how much you’re willing to share with the online community, especially when it concerns your embarassing moments and tribulations. Most importantly, take your bad luck with a grain of salt. 

Now, I’ll leave you with a few FMyLife postings that I’ve found both interesting and hilarious.

• Today, I decided it would be pretty amusing to press the “Like” button on everyone’s status on Facebook without reading them just to get on peoples’ nerves. After re-reading them later, I found out one of them said “I MISS YOU SOO MUCH GRANDMOM. RIP”. I liked that her grandmother died. FML.

• Today, I was at a sandwich shop and couldn’t help but secretly remove a loose hair from a girl standing in front of me. I yanked it and she instantly began screaming and crying. It was in fact a very long mole hair. The thing started bleeding like a gunshot wound. My apologies went unnoticed. FML.

• Today, I saw my boyfriend for the last time for two years. When we got back from dinner, we sat in his truck for a little while to talk. A few minutes later, my mom comes flying out of my house screaming, “Satan is here, and he is tempting you!” That is the last memory he will have of me. FML.

The second one made me laugh like a fool. Below, I’ve also included a vlog entry based on FMyLife. Enjoy!

Peace & love

Rach

 

Sources: 

Charles Bremner and Marie Tourres. “French Cash in on Internet Despair as Depression Builds Across Atlantic”. The Times, March 6th 2009.

FMyLife- Frequently Asked Questions. <http://www.fmylife.com/faq>

Let’s Hook Up, Babe March 22, 2009

  

 

 

Tangled in a mess.

 

Okay, so, I’m going to reiterate a familiar situation of a Saturday night for a university or college student. You’re relishing in the fact that you’ve just turned nineteen, the legal drinking age in Ontario, Canada. To celebrate your legality, you gather up a group of your pals and head out to a swanky club downtown for a night full of rounds of tequila shots, cheap beer, drunken words and lastly, an super-intensified libido which ultimately leads to a casual “hook-up” with that fellow across from the bar whom you thought was eerily creepy just four drinks prior. 

“Hooking up” was once a universal term used by many people as a way to initiate social interaction between two or more individuals in a platonic, non-sexual way.  Presently, this term has taken a different turn and now represents something completely different. According to Urban Dictionary, “hook-up” is defined as:

A purposely ambiguous, equivocal word to describe almost any sexual action. Usually used to exaggerate or minimize what exactly happened. A hook-up can range from a make-out session to full out sex.

Now, a hook-up can happen differently too. It could be with one of your guy pals or a casual acquintance. Regardless though, of how the hook-up happened, it can have the same brutal consequences. Jennifer Roback Morse, author of the article “The Hook Up Culture: When Sex Becomes Sport”, delves deep into what “hooking up” means and the effects that a one-night stand can have on the individuals involved, particularily women. 

It first begins with the “hook up mentality” in which sex is perceived as a casual recreational activity, a thing to do with the removal of emotions and personal ties. Hooking-up has even come to replace romantic relationships with friends-with-benefits more commonly referred to as “f*** buddies”. Hooking up is a large part of youth culture, specifically for teenagers and young adults. One can make the observation and conclude that teenagers and young adults are encouraged to hook up, and are praised by their peers when they do. Youth are pressured to seperate their feelings from sexual acts.

One problem though, is the ambiguity of the term. A girl can rant and brag about how she hooked up with this super hot guy the previous night, leaving the listener wondering what precisely she meant by “hooked up”.  It can range from an innocent make-out session to full blown sexual intercourse for frick’s sake! This is an advantage for the person involved in the hook-up, they can disclose any amount of information they want, and in many cases, over-exaggerate the extent of the hook-up.

One cause for this, is the ever increasing sexualization of our society and culture through the media affecting our morals and behaviour. The presense of sex in advertisements whether they be in the form of pictures in magazine spreads or commercials. Simply put, sex is used to sell. An excellent example of this, is Calvin Klein, notoriously known for their racy and pushing the envelope advertisements featuring scantily clad models in jeans. Another medium where sex is praised about is in the music industry. It is inescapable.

From my personal experience, it is common and not at all surprising to hear of a friend or acquintance hooking up with someone, whether they know the other person or not. In these instances, I observe and wonder to which extent do hook-ups affect males and females differently. From what I’ve seen, the males that participate in hook-ups tend to carry less feeling and attachment to the act. I hear far more “I regretted/feel bad about hooking up with (person’s name)” from females than males. Almost every hook-up I’ve heard about from one of my female friends, they’ve admitted to regretting taking part regardless of whether alcohol was involved or not. 

An explanation for this is the production of the chemical Oxycotin in the brain during sexual intercourse to promote feelings of connection and love. Males and females both produce this chemical, however due to the doses of testosterone produced by the male body, it surpresses the oxycotin.

All in all, people need to ask themselves whether or not a casual hook-up is a good idea. Sure, you might be caught up in the moment or tipsy from those darn tequila shots, but take a minute to think about how you’ll feel later on, and whether the person you’re with is really worth it (it is very common for guys post-hook-up to say that they will call or text, and never keeping to their word). Hook-ups can work for some people, but most of the time, this is not the case. Do yourself a favour and get cozy with someone who will stay at your apartment after a wild “hook-up” instead of making the awkward walk of shame at 7am. 

Peace & love

Rach

 

 

Sources:

Barbara F. Meltz. ”Hooking Up is the Rage, but is it Healthy?” The Boston Globe, February 13th 2007.

Jennifer Roback Morse. “The Hook Up Culture: When Sex Becomes Sport”. September 16th 2003 <http://www.ifeminists.net/introduction/editorials/2003/0916morse.html>

Urban Dictionary: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hook+up

Textually Active March 5, 2009

Don’t play innocent, I know you all do it.  You’ve met up with that cute guy or gal whom you’ve been eyeing in class at a restaurant for a quick bite and are hitting it off amazingly until an awkward lull in the conversation when he or she pulls out their cellphone to read and answer a text message. Maybe they’re fiddling with their cell phone under the table or have it in tow for the public to see while you’re fumbling to finish your sentence completely red in the face.  This leads to thoughts like, “Who are they texting?”, “Am I boring them?” and “Are they not into me?”. 

Within the past few years, text messaging has become a huge cultural phenomenon among teenagers and young adults as a method in which friends can keep in constant communication with the touch of a few buttons anywhere at any time. Many would say that text messaging is a convenient form of communication because it can be less disruptive than a phone call, but most importantly, it is amazingly cheaper. 

With these points in mind, text messaging seems to be a great and inexpensive way to keep in touch with your pals. What you might not have considered, though, is the strain it can put on your personal relationships with others. CTV.ca ran an article titled “Singles Say Texting and Dating are Not a Good Mix” in which it discusses the multiple uses of text messages and focuses on the negative effects of texting in romantic relationships.

In a relationship, texting is a popular way that couples keep in touch for flirting, connecting and “text sex”. Many young adults see it as a necessary form of additional communication aside from e-mails and phone calls. For others, texting is a great way to get out of a sticky situation. To save herself from an awkward date, 25 year old Liz Nelson texted her friend asking her to call her and rescue her.

This might be bad or rude on my part, but I told him my friend had an emergency and needed me. He totally called me out – whoops!

Want to know how popular text messaging has become? Alex Campell, the chief executive of company Vibes Media did a study of the number of text messages sent and received in the period of one month. In 2001, the number of text messages sent and received reached a meagre 1 million per month. Now, this number has risen to a shocking 75 billion per month. Another survey done by Pew Internet & American Life Project found that among the people over 18 years of age, half owned a cellphone for the purpose of text messaging.

Campbell also articulates how dating and text messaging can pose as a red flag in ruling out potential partners.  You should be concerned if your date would prefer to text rather than talking on the phone.  In an era where electronic forms of communication like e-mail, text messaging and instant messaging are the norm, everyone is expected to be in constant contact with one another.  Says Campbell about text messaging:

People understand it’s not right, but they still do it anyway. The information they’re getting back is worth the risk.

On the negative sign of things, texting can be toxic for relationships and when pursuing potential romantic partners. Many second dates have been ruled out with the constant use of text messaging with friends or ex-partners during dates. For many, texting on a date is annoying and unnattractive. If you’re texting at a restaurant, your date will get the vibe you’re not interested in them and would rather communicate electronically with someone else rather than having a face-to-face discussion. 

I can find it annoying when a date is fiddling around with their cellphone when I’m having a conversation with them. Another problem I have often encounted is the ambiguity of messages. What one perceives as sarcasm, another might take the message literally.

Now, you don’t have to chuck your cellphone into the garbage to assure a healthy romantic relationship. Simple little things can help, like, I don’t know, dialing their phone number? Just because texting is a norm doesn’t mean that you have to absolve all other more personal forms of communication. 

On a final note, since it’s relevant and because I’m THAT obsessed with the new movie “He’s Just Not That Into You”, the adorable character Mary, played by Drew Barrymore, vents on her woes of dating in the technological world.

I had this guy leave me a voicemail at work, so I called him at home, and then he emailed me to my BlackBerry, and so I texted to his cell, and now you just have to go around checking all these different portals just to get rejected by seven different technologies. It’s exhausting.

Peace & love

Rach

Anxiously waiting.

 Source: “Singles Say Texting and Dating are Not a Good Mix”. CTV.ca February 13th 2009.

http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20090213/texting_dating_090213/20090213?hub=SciTech

Facebook: Friends Forever February 25, 2009

25 Random Things I Didn’t Want to Know About You February 17, 2009

 

True, that.

Facebook annoys me severely. Other than being a convenient and easy way to keep in touch with friends and casual acquaintances, it serves me little purpose and proves to be a constant time-waster often used as a method of procrastination from homework. Nothing is more fun than feeling guilty after creeping your crush or enemy, wishing a “happy birthday” to that person you met from a friend-of-a-friend from that party last month, laughing at posted pictures of “LolCats” and RSVPing to events you’d prefer not to attend from people you barely know. Ah, yes, the joys of Facebook. We can all laugh at all the petty things that go on over Facebook or disregard it all together, but regardless of whether we like it or not, Facebook is one for the books.

 

Over the past few weeks, a growing fad that has made its way around Facebook profiles is the note titled “25 Random Things” where Facebook users post, well, 25 random things about themselves for the enjoyment of the public domain. I will admit, I’ve read several of these notes and smiled once or twice at a clever random fact or an inside joke, but other than that, what purpose does it serve?

Time magazine proposes that within the past week, 5 million Facebook users have bought into this fad with more than 125 million random facts floating around internetland. Claire Suddath writes:

Assuming it takes someone 10 minutes to come up with their list, this recent bout of viral narcissism has sent roughly 800,000 hours of worktime productivity down the drain.

I remember a few years ago before Facebook became popular amongst high school, college and university students, these notes came in the form of chain letters. A friend would send you an e-mail with fill-in-the-blank questions with their answers, then sending a mass e-mail to others demanding they do the same. These were popular for a while, but eventually faded and became scarce. What I’d like to know is where this note originated from and why it has become increasingly popular and widespread.

It’s no surprise how the “25 Random Things” note has circulated around Facebook with such popularity. The company review of Facebook states, “Facebook gives people the power to share and makes the world more open and connected. Millions of people use Facebook everyday to keep up with friends, upload an unlimited number of photos, share links and videos, and learn more about the people they meet.“ This may be true, but we all know that the popularity of the note orginated because of the fascination with self-definition. Facebook users are able to work at creating the person that they want to be, so it makes perfect sense that a note in which people are ancouraged to describe themselves and flaunt their stuff would catch on. Sample “random facts” include various things like knowing the dance moves to the infamous “Crank That” song by Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em or having a spider phobia to more personal things like what makes them cry or how they feel doomed to never experience love. 

It’s safe to say that this recent Facebook phenomenon won’t become a dying breed any time soon. With the growing number of people joining social networking websites, this fad is not only prevailent, it is unpredictable as well. 

It’s the network effect that powers everything online: The more people are doing it, the more incentive their friends have to join in.

And because I’m so modest and I’m tempted, I’ve decided to include a few of my own random facts. 

1. I do occasionally look at myself in the mirror. When caught without one, I’ve settled for a shiny spoon.
2. I’m not narcissistic, I’m just really, really, really, ridiculusly good looking… 
3. Oh, you get the idea.

Peace & love

Rach

 

Modesty at its finest

Source: 

 

Suddath, Claire. “25 Random Things I Didn’t Want to Know About You”. TIME. 5 February, 2009

Tossel, Ivor. “A Facebook Fad of Epidemic Proportions”.  The Globe and Mail. 12 February, 2009.

What a Doll! February 10, 2009

A typical couple, right?

Have you ever wondered whether the term “reality” is accurate at all? A dictionary definition would coin the term “real” as, “existing or occurring as fact; actual rather than imaginary, ideal, or fictitious” (Dictonary.com).  It would be fit to assume that the media we accept and the products we consume are accurately representitive of reality, right? Some would agree, but this assumption doesn’t sit well with me. One excellent example of how our perception of reality is skewed is exemplified by the seemingly innocent childrens doll, Barbie. That’s right ladies and gentlemen, Barbie is guilty of giving a false sense of reality! Put her in cuffs and arrest her, I say!

This topic first sparked my interest in my Pop Culture and Communication class as well as my Introduction to Women’s Studies class.  The relation between these two courses is what sparked my imagination of what Barbie is doing to my generation as well as to the individuals of younger generations.

From the moment one is born, the importance of gender is very apparent. A child growing up is given expectations of what they need to amount to and how they should act in certain situations. Parents and other peers typically buy pink and feminine things for girls and blue and masculine things for boys. These expectations stream into adulthood where we are taught to make friends, receive a good education, get a job with a good income so that you can get married, mass-produce spawn to eventually retire, enjoying the rest of your life in satisfaction and nostalgia.  This is the typical idea of success, perfection even.

The idea of perfection trickles into the idea of physical beauty and attractiveness. Barbie is an excellent example of this. The tall blue-eyed blonde was introduced to the public in February 1959 as “a teaching tool for femininity” (Dembner, “35 and Still a Doll”). Barbie is the ideal Western type female with long blonde hair, blue eyes, long slender legs, a small waist and a full, round chest. As well as being endowed with a perfect body, Barbie lives the fancy suburban life of consumption, acquiring luxury items such as clothes, accessories and the newest cars.  To top the list of a having a perfect life is Ken, the delightful and dreamy male companion to Barbie.  When Ken first hit the shelf in 1961, the manufacturers proclaimed Ken with a sense of “innocence, cleanliness, extroverted playfulness, boyish masculinity, and a hint of shyness” (Barbie Her Life and Times, 1987).

Michael Weiss, author of the book “Toys Were Us” types Barbie as “a model of bubbly teenage innocence” who also “projected every little girl’s dream of the future” (Toys Were Us, 2000). Girls began dreaming of their own futures and how they could make their Barbie dreams a reality. 

I’m sorry, but after looking through all of this information, I completely disregard the term “reality”. If reality is in the form of something unreasonably idealistic, it certainly fails to live up to its definition. It makes me uneasy to think of how younger generations are currently being affected by these dolls, especially with the introduction of the Bratz dolls with a proclaimed “passion for fashion”. Although there has been a lawsuit over the Bratz dolls under Barbie and Mattel, the American Psychological Association expressed concern over the Bratz dolls saying that:

Bratz dolls come dressed in sexualized clothing such as miniskirts, fishnet stockings, and feather boas. Although these dolls may present no more sexualization of girls or women than is seen in MTV videos, it is worrisome when dolls designed specifically for 4- to 8-year-olds are associated with an objectified adult sexuality.

Barbie has existed with amazing popularity for almost half of a century and continues to affect our culture considerably. I think it’s safe to say that she won’t be leaving the spotlight anytime soon. I can only hope that Barbie starts to show her age eventually becoming less and less popular. If not, charge her with crime against society and culture! Now there’s an idea, jailbird Barbie!

Bank Robbin' Barbies

 

Peace & love

Rach

 

Source:  

American Psychological Association, Task Force on the Sexualization of Girls (2007).

BillyBoy. Barbie Her Life and Times. New York: Crown Publishers, 1987.

Dembner, Alice. “35 and Still a Doll.” The Boston Globe. 9 March 1994. (23 April 2000).

Weiss, Michael. Toys Were Us. (7 March 2000)

Say whaaat!?! February 4, 2009

Imagine that you’re watching your favourite primetime television show at 8pm on a Wednesday night and the events unfolding onscreen are so ridiculous and interesting that you’re sitting on the edge of your couch clinging onto each word of dialogue. As soon as the plot is about to unfold or a character is about to reveal a secret detremental to the future of the show: COMMERCIAL BREAK. Everyone can let out a universal sigh or grunt of frusteration as we’ve all experienced the woes of inconvenient and pesky advertisements. We can almost make the assumption that we find commercials a waste of time and that we’d much prefer to watch our primetime shows in peace without disturbance of “As Seen on TV” products, fast food commercials, old people acting overly happy and the like. 

Going off topic for a little bit, my favourite commercials to hate on would have to be:

1. The “Oxi Clean” commercial- Seriously, what is the guy’s deal? He yells too much and he could pass as a model on a men’s beard dye box.
2. The “My Little Reminder” commercial- “Oh, no. Where did I park my car?” Instead of using their hard earned money on a crappy audio recorder, those sad little people could have invested their money in acting lessons.
3. The “Proactive” commercial- Z-list celebrities rambling on about their clear skin baffles me. Shouldn’t they be more worried about why their career is in the mud?

Back on topic. Like I mentioned before, we can all assume that advertisements are not only annoying, but pointless, right? Wrong. Researchers at the NYU Stern School of Business have determined in a new study that viewers find television programs more enjoyable when they are watched with commercials. That’s right. Researchers Leif D. Nelson at the University of California- Rady School of Management as well as Tom Meyvis and Jeff Galak at the NYU Stern School of Business have confirmed this.  Their study found that although viewers prefer to avoid commercial advertisements, that their experience in watching a television show was higher when commercials were included.

The study found that:

People often adapt to the experience of watching television such that each successive minute is slightly less enjoyable than the previous one. Advertisements, although independently aversive, disrupt this adaptation process and can therefore make the overall experience more enjoyable.

Now I know what you might be thinking. “I hate commercials, how could this be true?” The study said:

A disruption in a suspenseful plotline might heighten anticipation and intensify its subsequent resolution. Similarly, commercials may offer opportunities to elaborate on what viewers have watched so far or to savor what is still to come.

I’m not sure what this means to all of you, but I can relate to this.  When watching an intense television show with friends, during the commercial break we catch each other up and talk about what has just happened. It also heightens the excitement when the commercials are over and the show is back on.

It is important to point out though, that it’s not the content of the commercials that heighten enjoyment, it is the fact that they are present during the time slot.

It’s certainly interesting to think that commercial advertisements, not only do they push you to buy a certain product, they also happen to heighten the enjoyment of the television program.  I’ll take this into consideration the next time I’m watching LOST (which happens to be airing tonight!). No matter how unbearable the commercial breaks might be, I’ll be appreciative of the show (as well as equally confused, as LOST does to everyone). I’ll keep you posted.

Peace & love

Rach

 

Source: Nelson, Leif D., Meyvis, Tom and Galak, Jeff,Enhancing the Television-Viewing Experience through Commercial Interruptions(2009). Journal of Consumer Research, Vol. 36, August 2009. Available at SSRN: http://ssrn.com/abstract=1007767

Broadcast Yourself February 2, 2009

Happy February everyone! This February 1st 2009 has brought to my mind the happenings in recent years that have made a huge impact on our society and culture. I might have a slight obsession with the growing of YouTube and all the interesting content it contains submitted by people from around the globe. 

This month marks the 4th anniversary of YouTube since it hit the internet in February 2005 by Chad Hurley and Steve Chen, the first members of the YouTube management team who currently work as Chief Executive Officer and Chief Technology Officer. On YouTube’s Company History, it describes the website as:

The leader in online video, and the premier destination to watch and share original videos worldwide through a Web experience. YouTube allows people to easily upload and share video clips onwww.YouTube.com and across the Internet through websites, mobile devices, blogs, and email.

Everyone can watch videos on YouTube. People can see first-hand accounts of current events, find videos about their hobbies and interests, and discover the quirky and unusual. As more people capture special moments on video, YouTube is empowering them to become the broadcasters of tomorrow.

 

As part of the YouTube experience, users are encouraged to dig out their own niche by uploading and favouriting videos that reflect their personality and talents that might range from music to blogging, film or how-to’s about health, beauty and cooking. Almost anyone can find something on YouTube that appeals to them. 

What I find interesting is the growing number of talented musicians part of the YouTube generation who use the website to attract fans and popularity through uploading their musical content. This ranges from personal work to song covers of other popular artists. YouTube is certainly a driving force in the rise of the information and technology age where the general public is in more control over the media. In fact, YouTube’s demographic is evenly divided between males and females with an age range between 18-55. This has certainly contributed to the website’s success.

Who would have thought!

Peace & love

Rach

Source: http://www.youtube.com/t/fact_sheet

Pope Badass January 25, 2009

You know YouTube has become a huge phenomenon when The Vatican launches Pope Benedict XVI’s YouTube channel. CTV.ca ran an online article January 23rd to announce Benedict joining the digital generation in amateur video engineering.  The article writes “The Vatican said it was launching the channel to broaden Benedict’s audience while also giving the Holy See better control over the papal image online.”

Says Pope Benedict XVI:

“New technologies have an extraordinary potential if used to favour understanding and human solidarity. These technologies are a real gift for humanity: therefore we have to make sure the advantages they offer are put to the service of all peoples and communities. “

The Vatican’s YouTube channel proposes to cover the activities of Benedict as well as relevant Vatican events. The channel is updated daily.

Check out the YouTube channel for yourself!

Click here for the CTV article:

http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20090123/pope_youtube_090123/20090123?hub=SciTech

 

Peace & love

Rach